I used to think that the highest compliment anyone could give me regarding my music therapy work is "I love your music!" and I still feel a sense of satisfaction when someone says that to me after I come out of a session, or even if they were just walking past while I'm reviewing one of the videos of my sessions.
All along, I have been chasing this dream of becoming as good a musician as my mentor was. He ultimately motivated me to become better because I thought I admired his music, his skills as a musician. One day, I realised... that's not it. Being a music therapist isn't about being a great musician. I knew this all along- I studied it during the Masters course, met countless musical beings who were extremely talented musicians, but that doesn't mean they were cut out for music therapy. Someone once told me that the world of performance is a selfish world. Being a performer is a selfish career, and that it is so enlightening to be introduced into the world of music therapy.
The difference is that sensitivity in which one relates to others, the belief that they are all musical beings too, despite whatever condition they have. Yes, this is the essence of Nordoff-Robbins' creative music therapy approach. Yes, I'm highly biased because I am NR trained, and I adhere to their philosophy as the core of my work, but how true... their music may be not pitch perfect, their music may not be in time, in tune, or in sync, but to them, it may be the most beautiful music they have ever produced in all their lives. This capability of being able to produce music can then be further tapped into, developed, and made into something more beautiful each time. How will they do that? With the help of music therapists.
To be able to affirm someone's music is probably the thing I look forward to most in music therapy. To affirm is to support, to uphold, to defend. People make music all the time, and I'd think probably about 90% of all music created in this world appears for a short time and disappears without a trace in this world. It may exist in the minds of individuals, but even memories fade. Composers try desperately to pen their work down, make records, publicize their music, while others are not even able to do. Teenagers make up lyrics, kids hum random tunes, or tap random keys on the piano. I have met some clients who get so immersed in their music that even though they may be strumming nothing remotely close to a "proper" chord on the guitar, their expression shows more enjoyment than a gifted guitarist playing the most intricate piece of music. I have met a client who sings into the microphone with a deep baritone voice. He will close his eyes, raise his voice and move his hand with flair like a seasoned idol singer... but with not a series of notes "in tune" to any music that an observer may know, but who are we to say that the music does not make perfect sense to him? Who are we to say that he is "out of tune"?
That's the thing isn't it? Music can be vaguely defined as "a series of notes", and a client may make any series of notes and it can be classified as music. Of course, that is not to say that all sounds made can be defined as music (though this is debatable too). I like to think that the sound of a jackhammer is noise, but the frantic banging of a cymbal can be music. I don't classify chanting as music because I dislike monotone (again, I know this is technically "wrong", but jokes aside, being a melodic being, I like variation in pitch and tonality), but there are a lot of musical styles I dislike. Music is such a personal thing. One may be more into rhythms and beats, while the other may be more into harmonies and melodies. I used to dislike pop music, but found myself using it more and more in therapy sessions simply because I've learnt to accept that pop music may be exactly what a particular client need. That's one of the challenges being a music therapist- we cannot stick to one style because what we do requires music to be a flexible and versatile entity.
I digress. Back on topic- to affirm someone's music is what I believe my work should revolve around. To let someone know that their music did not just happen and disappear without anyone hearing it, without anyone witnessing it, without anyone enjoying it or realizing what they have done. Too many times have I improvised a piece of music which expressed exactly what I was thinking, the mood I was in, the pent up feelings I had, and felt extremely pleased with myself afterwards, only to wish I had recorded it so I could reflect and hear those notes again.... but the realization that the music is forever gone, vanished into thin air, dampened whatever accomplishment or sense of satisfaction I had.
I won't say that because I felt this way countless times, so too will others feel the same way. I cannot say my clients feel that same sense of frustration and or emptiness when they make an effort to do something only to be ignored or disregarded. Or simply having no one there to affirm. It will be fair to say, however, that what any music therapist needs to do is to develop a type of working relationship with their clients before being to work with them in an efficient manner. So, going with this thought of affirming someone's music, I will imagine it'd give someone an awareness. Awareness of themselves in relation to others, awareness of an interaction happening between them and someone else- us, the music therapists. When they vocalise, when they play an instrument they have never played for the first time, when they explore their own potential, when they realise they can do something they had no idea they could do and have it reciprocated, responded to, made into something tangible and musical, that is when the "magical moments" happen. It then develops. Tentative playing becomes bolder, stronger, voices become louder, expressions of happiness, excitement, surprise and amazement, all these are what music therapists work towards, amongst many other goals.
It's all good to want to affirm someone's music and support their music making experience, but what of those who do not respond to any attempts of making music?
TBC.
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